When a woman is pregnant, many people seem to want to give her advice she didn’t ask for. This advice can often be annoying; however, sometimes it’s helpful. The problem is that friends, family members and complete strangers seem to leave out some very important details when they give advice.

A first time mom is bound to have questions and some fear about the childbirth process. It’s hard to know what to expect when it’s something you have never been through before. A new mom doesn’t know to ask about much more than opinions on whether or not to get an epidural, and the actual experience of childbirth might surprise her in ways she never expected.

One Reddit user asked, “Women who have given birth, what’s something no one told you about it and wish you had known?” We love how this question is phrased. There are certainly things we didn’t know before giving birth, and it made us wonder why no one (including our doctor) told us what to really expect. 

If you’re pregnant, scroll down for a list of things nobody else has probably dared to tell you about childbirth. If you have given birth before, you will probably find yourself nodding in agreement at some of the items on this list.

1. Complimenting the Placenta

   Reddit user P8II wrote:

   Apparently some doctors are really excited when they see a good placenta. Well, a compliment is a compliment, I guess.

2. “Like a Slip-n-Slide”

   Added by cheddarchexchick:

   How…..wet everything can get. If your water breaks and you have a slow leak… there’ll be fluid at home, in the car, in the waiting/triage area, in your room, in the hallway, in the bathroom. Combined with all the blood loss and peeing yourself, and it’s almost like a slip-n-slide trying to get around. They gave me a big chuck pad to put between my legs but it was kind of pointless because it wouldn’t stay up unless you held it.

3. What a C-Section Is Really Like

   Added by Olive09:

   The first time you get up after a c section is hell. Absolutely hurts so bad and your incision takes weeks to heal if not months.Being awake during your c section and you feel all the tugging and pulling inside you.

4. Contractions After Childbirth

   Written by CowCamp:

   Your uterus continues to contract after delivery to get back down to pre-prego size. It’s pretty painful, worse than menstrual cramps. And breastfeeding really kicks the contractions into high gear.

5. Pain Is Not Completely Avoidable

   leasaur wrote:

   A lot of women throw up! I have a vomit phobia and was not aware of this until about a month before I was due. Luckily there are drugs you can take that help (I managed to avoid throwing up with a lot of drugs).Also the pain wasn’t as gradual as I was expecting. I went from “this is fine” to “this is not fine make it stop” in maybe half an hour. But then you have to wait before they can get you set up with an epidural, so it’s hard to avoid that “not okay” period entirely.

6. Peeing Is Painful

   Added by irisaura:

   It hurts to pee afterwards, but if you lean forward on the toilet then the pee goes away from the most painful areas.Also try and time your pain relief around trips to the toilet or other strenous activities.

7. Month-Long Period

   Shared by Sidekickgirl75:

   That you have the worst month long period of your life after giving birth. I read books, took childbirth classes and had no idea. Not a nice surprise.

8. Shaking

   ToastedRawhide wrote:

   The shaking after giving birth surprised me! I kept apologizing to everyone who was still working on me or the baby, but they said it was totally normal. I’d never heard of it before!

9. What PPD Is Really Like

   Kiwigirl80 shared:

   I had known about PPD and the “baby blues”, but it was honestly sickening to me how sad I was after getting home from the hospital. I had wanted a baby for so long, finally had him and then just hated it. I felt like “what did I do? Why did I do this?” It was a shock. I had thought about just leaving. Which was absurd. Eventually it went away and I enjoyed my little boy. I mean, at the time too though, I did love being a mom because I constantly checked on him, took pics and all that. But the depression you get can be surprising, considering how badly I wanted to be a mom and then I’m like “I wish I was anywhere but with him.”

10. Back Pain

    cassanthrax wrote:

    Sometimes there are no contractions. If you have back labour, it’s just ohmygodmyinsideswantokillme extreme pain for several hours, instead of getting a little break between the contractions. That was sure swell to experience.

11. “You Stop Caring”

    Shared by Buffalocookiebutter:

    Random strangers were going to be feeling me up, from the inside to see how dilated I was. Every couple hours. After a while you stop caring.

12. Showering Is Amazing

    gosglings wrote:

    THAT SHOWER! That first glorious shower… you’re filthy, sweaty, covered in body fluids. You’re marinating in hormones that make you feel rapturous. That SHOWER! So amazing.

13. Large Blood Clots

    starlaluna shared:

    That after birth you can pass large clots. When I say large I mean large. My first shower after a nurse found me crying in the shower because I thought I was dying because a baseball sized clot came out. She told me that was normal. It looked like I gave birth to a bloody jellyfish.

14. Hair Loss

    Written by EthanEpiale:

    And nobody told me how long it takes to get back to normal. I’m a year and a half out and I’m just now fully feeling normal again. It’s nuts what pushing a kid out does to your body.On a more lighthearted note the extreme hair loss was unexpected lol. I was so sad watching my glorious pregnant hair literally go down the drain. It’s okay, my kid had a hormone related hair loss at the same time so we were in that one together. (Both our hair came back lol)

15. Labor Can Be Slow or Very Fast

    calyxte212 added:

    Labor and pushing can go go very quickly. You hear a lot about being in labor all night and pushing for hours, I only had to push twice. It was kind of surreal and I was a little disassociated from the whole experience because there’s so much hype and build up and then it was just over.I’m glad I wasn’t in pain for hours but I wish I had known fast and furious was a possibility.