If you ask any happily married person what they value most in their relationship, they might tell you about the wonderful communication, high trust, and respect they have for each other. Typically, people look for these traits when they choose their life partner, and without them, well, you’re looking at a not-so-great marriage.
One woman thought she had found all of these characteristics in her future husband, but after being married to him for just a couple of hours, she realized that he couldn’t stay that way a moment longer. That’s right, she asked him for a divorce just a day after the big day.
So what exactly happened? It all went down at the cake-cutting event during their wedding. One of the biggest controversial wedding traditions is that after the new husband and wife cut their cake, the groom smashes the cake into the wife’s face. To keep it a little more humble, the groom sometimes just smears it along with the bride’s nose or cheek, as to not ruin the hundreds of dollars in hair and makeup she spent—not to mention, the cake and her sanity!
Not everyone partakes in this tradition. In fact, this divorce-seeking bride specifically told her husband that she did NOT want him to rub cake in her face, for obvious reasons. She was very clear about it upfront.
“Being a reasonable man who knows me well, he didn’t,” she explained in her letter to Slate magazine’s advice column called “Dear Prudence,” where readers submit various questions. “Instead, he grabbed me by the back of the head and shoved my head down into it. It was planned since the cake was DESTROYED, and he had a bunch of cupcakes as backup.”
Oh no he DIDN’T.
She went on to explain that in her heart of hearts she knows that she can’t stay married to him—how could she when he couldn’t respect the one thing she had asked of him, completely disrespecting her on her own wedding night? However, she’s struggling because all her friends and family say she should give him another chance.
“I left. Next day I told him we were done. I am standing by that. The thing is that over the holidays EVERYONE has gotten together to tell me I should give him a second chance,” she wrote.
The answer from Dear Prudence might surprise you—but man, is it spot on!
“Everyone’s sure you’re making a mistake, but they’re not the ones who have to wake up every day with a man whose behavior massively turns them off,” they wrote back. “You are. So you only have to listen to yourself. I think what he did was a red flag about not respecting you and your wishes—to say nothing of the physical aggression—but even if it wasn’t, the fact that you really didn’t like it is enough. Make a mental note about which of your loved ones don’t seem to value your happiness, and continue with your divorce.”
Well…we wish this woman a happy divorce! What would you have done in this situation?