Marriage – for some people it’s something they dream of from the time they’re children. They picture a wedding day, a spouse they love and a happily ever after.

For other people, marriage isn’t something they’ve thought too much about, but one day they meet “the one” and suddenly marriage seems like the right decision.

Then, there are people who have thought quite a lot about why they absolutely do not want to get married. This could be because they have been married before and don’t want to go through that struggle and drama again. It could be because they think marriage is outdate. It could be because they know married people who seem unhappy. Whatever the reason, and there are many, they have decided they will never get married.

BuzzFeed asked their community to share reasons why they don’t want to get married, and the answers poured in. Scroll down to discover how 17 different people responded when asked why they don’t want to get married.

1. Outdated

   BuzzFeed community member kitty wrote:

   Marriage represents a business transaction of women from her father to her husband and his family. it’s sexist and outdated and costs too much anyway.

2. Benefits Men but Not Women

   caribella explained:

   Marriage seems to really only benefit men. Studies show married men live longer than single men but the reverse is true for women. Marriage shortens a woman’s lifespan. There was even a study that showed men sleep better next to their wives & again the reverse is true for women, they sleep worse next to their husbands. Why would I want to take part in marriage knowing that? Plus I’ve seen the struggle of my mother & older sisters with their husbands who expect them to do the large majority of the housework & child rearing while still working full time. Meanwhile their husbands come home from work & do nothing. It just seems like marriage adds way more work to a woman’s life & I can’t see that it provides any benefits so it’s a no from me.

3. Not For Us

   wyntersdarkness shared:

   My significant other and I don’t want marriage or kids. We’ve been together for over 21 years. People just assume that if you are together long enough then you should get married. We aren’t interested. There’s the saying, “If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.” We’re fine the way we are.

4. Married Women Seem Unhappy

   Kitten Claw chimed in:

   I used to dream of getting married and spending my life with one person forever, but then I took a look at all the marriages around me. Out of all of my family members and friends who were married it seemed like the women were miserable even if they denied it. I don’t see any benefit from their relationships, it’s like their light has been snuffed out. I don’t want that to happen to me.

5. Divorce Would Be Very Hard

   SpikeyBlue answered:

   Had my heart broken twice, each time was a long term relationship and separating myself from the other person was a nightmare, I couldn’t imagine how much harder and more expensive it would be to dissolve a marriage. Also, I was never one of those girls who dreamt about their wedding day since they were a child, I just never imagined that marriage would happen for me.

6. “I’m Not Signing Anything”

   Sawyer wrote:

   I personally don’t see the reason for it. It’s an outdated archaic practice that in my opinion, is still about property. I don’t even like signing cellphone contracts, so I’m not gonna sign one for a relationship either. I’m content with a spiritual marriage but I’m not signing anything.

7. Toxic Relationships

   monicah6 shared:

   My parents early relationship was very toxic although they settled down by the time we hit our teens. Two of my siblings married and both were very toxic – one couple divorced and the other couple settled down. For me, it just didn’t happen, I never found a love of my life, I don’t believe in that soul mate stuff – I find it a load of bunk. I was in a long term relationship for seven years and it got very toxic towards the end that it soured me. I get more satisfaction now traveling the world and trying different foods.

8. “Life Changes”

   ChillYoRoll explained:

   I never want to be legally bound to another human no matter how much I love them. Life changes too quickly to ever get married. Get a living Will/Trust.

9. It’s “Insane”

   Ryrashii added:

   The thought of spending a lot of money on a wedding for a piece of legal document is insane. Also I do not believe in what it’s trying to sell me. Joint everything, your tax bracket goes up, someone constantly in my space, snoring, cooking and washing more clothes… just no.

10. “Scared”

    aspia answered:

    I need personal space and alone time. Also, I don’t belong to my father and don’t want to be handed off to my husband. The whole concept is just really sexist and outdated. Also, I am scared that I will marry someone who will become abusive after we are married and then be stuck dealing with them until I can escape and get a protection order/ divorce.

11. Freedom

    hellocomputer1701 wrote:

    I’m finally free from a long term abusive relationship and I treasure my freedom too much to ever risk it again

12. “Happy Single”

    evie! commented:

    When I was a child I saw marriages that I thought would last forever break and ruin and I don’t want to go through that or put other people through it. Besides, it is an outdated practice in which I want no part. I am happy single and would preferably stay that way. I don’t want to depend on someone else

13. “No Longer Necessary”

    abbymyers12 explained:

    Marriage is no longer necessary as women do not need to rely on men for financial and housing purposes. Women can now get well-paying jobs, have their own credit cards, rent or purchase a home, and own/lease their own vehicle. It is also unfeasible for disabled people as they lose any money they get from the state once they have “someone to take care of them.” Finally, I am asexual, so I don’t want or need a partner to fulfill any dreams. I prefer to be on my own or with close friends, and I don’t need a spouse for that.

14. Independence

    leager129 shared:

    I love my independence! As someone planning to apply to medical school in my early 30s, I can feel confident applying broadly without worrying about someone not wanting to relocate or be in a long distance relationship. I have an easier time focusing on my studies living alone without someone expecting time from me that I can’t give. Not only would I not feel something’s missing if I never marry, but I honestly would be happier being single.

15. Not Monogamous

    karlenec answered:

    Marriage is generally viewed as a monogamous thing, and I am not a monogamous creature.

16. Anxiety Disorder

    TMar_Of_Vulcan added:

    I’m a loner who wants to do her own thing. Having to constantly wait for someone else in order to make decisions would drive me insane. Also, I suffered from a debilitating anxiety disorder since I was a teenager and sabotaged any guys’ interest in me because dating caused me so much anxiety. Now it just seems like I’ve missed my chance, but it’s fine because I’m old and set in my ways.

17. The Divorce Rate

    baobaopanda wrote:

    Marriage has a 50 percent chance of failure. Not exactly encouraging odds.