When you’re young and in love, or single and wishing you were in love, it can be easy to gloss over what really matters when it comes to deciding who you’re going to marry. Sure, it matters that you’re attracted to each other and like being together, but there are other things to consider, things that many people don’t consider before their wedding day.

What will your spouse be like as a parent? What will your spouse be like as a spouse? We’re not talking on the honeymoon but years later when life isn’t always easy.

Kari Boyer is a wife and mother, and she decided to share what she thinks is important to look for in a spouse. She has been married for 15 years, and she wrote on Facebook that she and her husband have “3 kids and a baby in Heaven.”

One day, her 13-year-old daughter was so sick that she couldn’t even keep water down. She saw her husband lying on the floor next to her daughter, and in that moment, she realized that’s the kind of man you want to marry.

Boyer posted a picture of her husband and daughter lying on the floor, and she wrote a lengthy post to accompany the picture and explain what was on her mind.

Boyer’s post was addressed to “young ladies.” Her point was to share the kind of man young ladies should pray that they will marry. She wrote, “Young ladies, when the season of life comes and you’re starting to pray for a spouse to spend your life with… pray for the kind of man that will lay next to your future 13yr old, on the bathroom floor praying over her because she can’t keep a drop of water down.” She continued by explaining that not only did her husband lay on the floor with their daughter, but he also carried her to the car, drove her to the hospital, and spent the night at the hospital with her. 

Caring for children isn’t the only thing that Boyer believes is important in a spouse. She also believes it’s important for a husband to have his priorities straight. She explained, “Pray for a spouse that will wake up at 6:30am on Sunday and get his family around and lead them to the House of God. Because, if he can wake up at 4:30am on Saturday to hunt… he can wake up at 6:30 on Sunday to lead his family to salvation.”

Then Boyer stressed how important it is not to settle but to make sure you marry the spouse God has for you. She wrote, “No amount of waiting for a husband is worse than settling for the wrong spouse and losing years of your life living outside of the will of God.”

Do you agree with Boyer’s thoughts on what makes a great spouse? If you’re married, did you pray for your spouse before you got married?