Figuring out how to parent is one of the toughest things there is—and figuring out how to do it with your spouse can sometimes be even tougher.
It’s fine to disagree over little things like what kind of diapers to buy or what to dress your kid in that day; these things don’t leave a lasting impression on the child.
But what if you disagree about bigger things, like whether or not to vaccinate your child?
One father recently turned to Reddit when he realized he and his wife have polar opposite views on vaccinations.
He titled the post, “My wife has fallen for the anti-vaxx nonsense and refuses to vaccinate our child! I’m growing very worried,” which pretty much speaks for itself.
He explained that while his wife is usually pretty level-headed, she’s refusing to give their child any vaccines because “she got sucked into one of those anti-vax Facebook indoctrination camps.”
Dad doesn’t believe that vaccinations can cause any kind of diseases to their child, and wants to make sure that their child is properly protected. But while Mom is being stubborn, he admits she has good intentions as well. “I know that in her mind, she’s coming from a place of love for our child,” he said.
But yet, he’s upset that he isn’t able to get through to her. He said he’s tried everything he can think of to change his wife’s mind. He’s tried showing her statistics or teaching her a lesson about correlation not equaling causation. But nothing’s working.
“She won’t budge and hasn’t budged for weeks now,” he wrote. “Our arguments are devolving into the same tired routine over and over again and I’m worried that the only thing which will wake her up is our child being afflicted by some horrible disease like measles which could’ve been easily avoided.”
He ended the post with one basic question: “Is there any way I can sneakily just bring my child to the doctor and have her vaccinated without my wife’s knowledge?”
People who read the thread had all kinds of advice for the dad, ranging from “just do it” to “do you want your marriage to end?”
The basic consensus was that since they’re married and have equal say in how they raise their child, he’s technically allowed to take the child to get vaccinated—it’s just that, what’s going to happen when his wife finds out?
“Right now you’re married and both have equal say in your child’s care. That also means there is absolutely nothing preventing you from taking your child to a doctor and having her vaccinated,” someone wrote, adding the disclaimer: “That might mean you wind up with a divorce. It also means your child won’t, you know, die of measles.”
After reading all the comments, the father updated the post saying that he’s decided that he’s going to try one more time to talk sense into his wife, and if that doesn’t work, he’s going to likely take the child to get vaccinated. He ended it with a capital “WILL KEEP YOU POSTED.”
Stay tuned—this could get ugly!
What do you think about this dad’s question? Would you ever do something like this behind your spouse’s back? What’s your opinion on vaccinations?