When it comes to wedding planning, everyone has a different type of budget. But it’s probably important that you agree upon that budget with your spouse if you’re both paying for the wedding. After all, no one wants money disputes before they’re even married!
After one woman got engaged, she was so excited about picking out her wedding dress. She always envisioned a particular style, and, though expensive, she had the means to pay for it. However, her soon to be husband didn’t want her to spend such a large amount on a dress, so there were quite a few disagreements about it.
In a post on “Am I the A**hole?” on Reddit, the woman shared her story, and said how her fiancé “suggested I rent a dress instead of buying one. He started saying that I’m being irresponsible with money.”
However, she decided that since she was spending her own money, she’d go ahead and buy the one she wanted. So she did. However, it soon went missing from her closet.
“I freaked out but he told me he returned it and got the money back,” the woman wrote. “I was shocked I asked him why he did that and he said he thought the dress was ridiculously expensive and that was wasting money and AGAIN suggested I go rent one.”
Well, that didn’t go over well. “I blew up and went off on him which I’ve never done before,” she said. “He literally took few steps back and told me to calm down. I said he had no right, I’m the one paying for the damn dress.”
His argument was that in a marriage, people have to make monetary decisions together. “He kept on about how I must expect to him to pay for everything while I keep ‘my money’ or spend it irresponsibly (but I never tell him how to spend his money)—I responded that he gets zero say in how I spend my money whatsoever,” she said.
That ended in another argument. He even got his mother involved, who also suggested to her that she buy a cheaper dress.
Now, the woman is confused on whether she’s being the jerk in this situation—or is he?
Reddit has spoken, and most people say he’s definitely being a jerk here.
“He literally stole from you and then called his mom to tell you he was right? Time to cancel the wedding!” someone wrote.
“If you are spending your own money and it is not going to wipe you out financially, I would seriously reconsider marriage to a person like this. It will NEVER change. Don’t settle please,” another said.
“I don’t care if the dress cost 10 billion dollars, you do not return a bride’s WEDDING DRESS without discussing it with her first,” another ragreed. “And last I checked, your mother in law isn’t your accountant and should have 0 say over how you spend your money. If your fiance wants to discuss budget issues as a couple, that’s great! That’s the fine and responsible thing to do. Him throwing a temper tantrum and then crying to mom is not that.”
What do you think—who is the jerk here?