Kids say the darndest things, don’t they? When they’re not throwing temper tantrums or begging for our food, a lot of the time parents find their kids rather witty—especially if they’re trying to name something they don’t know the word for.
In a recent Twitter thread, moms and dads shared their favorite names their kids have given to common things. They may be saying them wrong, but they’re pretty hilarious. Here are our favorite ones!
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A Word for Tissues
my 4-year-old calls a box of tissues a “bless you box”
— Andrew Knott (@aknott21) May 23, 2021
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A Word for Trampolines
My 4 called trampolines, Jumpolines. It just makes more sense. 🤷♀️
— Victoria Bond (@battmanbond) May 22, 2021
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A Word for Diary
4 has been carrying a small notebook around all day. She opens it, writes small scribbles and quickly closes it back up. She’s calling it her “secret diarrhea” and maybe someday day I’ll correct her, but definitely not today.
— MomTransparenting (@momtransparent1) December 30, 2019
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A Word for Deodorant
My daughter calls deodorant “armpit makeup”. You’re welcome.
— Stephen Amell (@StephenAmell) May 29, 2018
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A Word for Melatonin
My 13 year old: those edibles hit hard last nightMe: OMG do NOT call the children’s melatonin gummies edibles in public please
— Jill Krause (@babyrabies) May 19, 2021
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A Word for “Today”
My three year old calls it ‘this day’ instead of ‘today’ and I shall never correct him. ‘Is it going to be sunny this day?’ ‘What are we playing this day?’. Thinking of adopting it myself.
— Lee Madgwick (@LeeMadgwick) September 1, 2020
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A Word for Geese
my four year old daughter is calling geese “honkeys” and I should probably correct her but I won’t
— That Mom Tho (@mom_tho) August 27, 2020
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A Word for a Sunroof
My 2 year old son calls the sunroof in the car the sky window and I think the whole word should adopt this
— Dr Lizzi Helsby 💙 (@Lizzimooneydoc) September 2, 2020
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A Word for Sandals
Last night my kid kept calling my slide sandals my “strap-ons” and I feel bad I couldn’t tell him why I almost wet my pants laughing.
— Emily McCombs (@msemilymccombs) June 14, 2021
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A Word for Umbrella
My three year old calls it ‘this day’ instead of ‘today’ and I shall never correct him. ‘Is it going to be sunny this day?’ ‘What are we playing this day?’. Thinking of adopting it myself.
— Lee Madgwick (@LeeMadgwick) September 1, 2020
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A Word for Jeans
my niece is 6 and she hates wearing jeans because she hates the zippers and how they scrunch up. but she doesn’t call them jeans, she calls them “weiner pants” and i wish i didn’t find that out as she yelled it in the store.
— Dadman Walking (@dadmann_walking) July 1, 2021
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A Word for Shoe Laces
My son called his shoe laces, “tyers”. 😂😂 he said “you’re stepping on my tyers” lmaooo. I mean they do get tied 😂😂
— Papolo (@PaperChaser_P) November 20, 2019
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A Word for the Empire State Building
My three-year-old son just asked me, “Can you take me to the Vampire State Building?”
— Jim Gaffigan (@JimGaffigan) July 16, 2014
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A Word for Teeth
My daughter calls her teeth smile bones 🤣🤣
— 🌻♌️ (@_chelseajustine) July 10, 2021
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A Word for Coffee
When my guy was 3 he named coffee grounds “bean dirt”
— hael swerc (@SativieNicks) May 22, 2021
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A Word for Gloves
My 7yo calls her gloves “finger mittens” and now I will never, ever call them anything else.
— Goldfish and Chicken Nuggets (@gfishandnuggets) March 30, 2021
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A Word for a Clementine
5: mom can i have a lemon tongue?me: wut5: for a snack?me:5: a baby orange!me: omg. yes, you may have a clementine 💀
— That Mom Tho (@mom_tho) July 1, 2021
Has your child ever made up a word or misunderstood it? Share your best example!