When you meet someone for the first time, one of the first questions he or she will probably ask is, “What do you do for a living?” Saying the same boring job title or company name answer over and over again might get old fast, but you could choose to be funny and get creative with your answer.
Twitter user Jeremy Padawer tweeted, “Poorly explain what you do for a living.” He was surprised and overwhelmed by the number of responses he received.
I am overjoyed w/ the earnest, often hilarious, explanations of “what you do for a living.” I never imagined the impact of one word “poorly” would provide an outlet to drop guard, revealing raw humanity. I ❤️when social media brings us together for a laugh & a moment. Thank u.
— Jeremy Padawer (@JeremyCom) October 18, 2020
We’re loving the hilarious yet truthful answers too. It’s refreshing to see people downplay their jobs instead of making them out to be more incredible than they actually are.
Scroll down to read some hilarious answers to Padawer’s tweet. If you don’t understand what job is being described at first, read it again. When it hits you, you’re sure to find yourself smiling.
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I tell computers to do things. Sometimes they listen.
— Comfortably Numb (@YGalanter) October 18, 2020
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Strangers call me, I load them in a truck, poke them w/needles, hook them up to wires/tubes, sometimes push drugs or briefly electrocute them until we reach our destination – which is a large warehouse w/other broken people & fluorescent lights. They thank me for my service.
— Shea Rossomando (@Run_Fox_Run) October 18, 2020
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Shout loudly, rhythmically, occasionally in tune and flounce about in someone else’s clothes in front of thousands of strangers.
— Socialist Opera Singer (@OperaSocialist) October 18, 2020
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I steal your money for the government and let you have whats left
— 𝐹𝒶𝓃𝓃𝓎𝓉𝑜𝑜𝓈𝒽 (@midgequan) October 19, 2020
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I watch news & sports all day so I can write it down for other people who saw the same thing to read also
— Makut Junior (@MakutJunior) October 19, 2020
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I watch tiny humans exit larger humans, and if they need, I keep them for a while while I put tubes and needles in them until they don’t die. Then I give them back to the bigger humans to take them to their human place to help them get big.
— Dibie Fed Up With 🍊🎪 (@dibiethennp) October 18, 2020
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I take bones that are arranged in a way that I find not pleasing and then I line them up in a way that I like. Then I screw in some metal.
— Travis Hanson, MD (@footankle) October 17, 2020
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I carry something that makes people avoid talking to me.
— Jaden Jefferson (@Jaden_Reports) October 18, 2020
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Speak to a screen full of black squares with names in them. Then I spend another 6-9 hours planning things to say to the black squares, trying to coax them into interacting, all while hearing how I don’t deserve my salary because I don’t really do anything anyhow.
— Kelly Ferguson, NBCT (@Kelferg) October 18, 2020
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Make up things that never happened and then admit that none of it is true.
— Catherine Ryan Hyde (@cryanhyde) October 18, 2020
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Write words for famous people to say that sound like things they would say if I wasn’t writing words for them.
— David Wild (@Wildaboutmusic) October 18, 2020
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Write words for famous people to say that sound like things they would say if I wasn’t writing words for them.
— David Wild (@Wildaboutmusic) October 18, 2020
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I connect the thing to the other thing over and over again before flipping a switch and hoping I didn’t just kill myself or someone else
— Lincoln Grift Project 🤮 (@LeftistMoniker) October 18, 2020