Girls: they’re smart, they’re capable, they’re innovative and some of them are really, REALLY funny!

If you’re nodding your head right now in enthusiastic agreement, we’re guessing that you have had the pleasure of raising one yourself. This means that you know that it doesn’t get more entertaining than when a second grader gives you a long-winded and hilarious response to you asking her how her day went.

Lucky for us, a father of four girls is taking to his Twitter page to document all of the very best things that his little ones are saying on a daily basis.

Just take the tweet up at the top of this page, for example. This is James Breakwell’s daughter snuggling up with a jar of peanuts while he bemoans the fact that his flesh and blood would rather spoon a savory snack than one of the “10,000 stuffed animals” in the family home.

Yep, we told you this would be funny— but considering Breakwell’s professional background, it’s not so surprising that his adorable spawns would have such a silly sense of humor.

You see, the Twitter-famous dad is actually a comedy writer by day, who also just so happens to be the bestselling author of Only Dead on the Inside: A Parent’s Guide to Surviving the Zombie Apocalypse. With a title like that, you know that he doesn’t buy into the high-pressure parenting climate in which we currently live.

Just take the following tweet, for instance:

From the sound of it, it seems like his kindergartner is not exactly using her school time to focus on learning her ABCs.

Now, we’re not in the Blackwell household, so we don’t know what the repercussions are for sneaking a dragon book into class, but if daddy Blackwell got such a big kick out of the response that he posted it to his uber-popular Twitter account, then we’re guessing that the little gal wasn’t disciplined too harshly.

Of course, not all of Blackwell’s tweets have to do with his kids’ inattention in the classroom. In fact, he regularly shares his platform so that his daughters can share their inspiring, feminist sayings with the rest of the world.

Yep, it doesn’t get much more kick-butt than that, folks! We’re pleased to hear that his 7-year-old is standing up for herself and has enough confidence to one-up all of her rude naysayers on the playground. You go, girl!

Now, it’s important to note that Breakwell’s daughters don’t just have a funny take on school. They also bring their signature brand of humor to their Netflix binges, too.

We are totally with this little girl! Sometimes movies are so draining. Who has time for all of that unnecessary drama, anyway? Certainly not a 6-year-old with other things to do!

To get more of James Breakwell’s daily daughter-sayings, be sure to follow his Twitter account, @XplodingUnicorn.

We’d love to hear your take on these hilarious tweets! Do you have a kiddo that has a funny take on life? Does their sense of humor ever get them into trouble?